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"I have been trying to find the right words to say in this moment of my life, but there aren't words to describe or express how I truly feel. I've experienced loss before and have mourned over other family members but you were different. I didn't get my whole life Growing up with you, but my boys did. I got to watch you be the grandfather to them I wish I would have allowed you to be for me. I'm so thankful for the last 7 years of truly getting to know you as a person. You are funny and very smart. I can still hear your laugh and see the way your face lites up. The way you would get teary eyed as you watched Grant and Grayson play. I can hear your voice saying "I love you Granddaughter," and feel your arms around me. I can see the way you looked when talking about your favorite things. The way you talked to Nini. I loved watching the two of you together. Your love was genuine and it filled my heart with such joy. Its what i wanted and have found with Eli. You helped me become the woman I am today. I'll never forget when I told you how bad I had messed up in my past. I was worried you'd judge me, but you didn't. Instead you assured me that we all make mistakes. You allowed me to see that people can grow from their hurt. I love you and still can't seem to accept that any of this is real. When I try to, I stop and I cry. It's like I can't comprehend you not being here. I know it'll get easier but right now it feels like there's no end to it. So many people loved and adored you. It made me so proud to be a part of your family. I thought writing would help me cope, but I just want to always remember the day a part of my heart left this earth. I know you loved all of us very much. I'm thankful to have known that love. I was supposed to see you in 7 days, I was counting down to hugging you and telling you about my day! Having Eli tell you about his new job and just being there with you and Nini. But God had other plans for you. Despite the hurt im feeling i know that you're ok. You're not hurting and not in anymore pain. No more shots, pills or eye drops. No more long trips to Atlanta for the VA. You hated that traffic. Lol Pawpaw you were a one of a kind man and I will never forget all that you have done in this life. I just really wish we could've had just a little more time. I will always love you!
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